Ask Coach: How To Connect Better With People (In Particular Your IT Solutions Provider Staff)

By Rich Anderson, executive coach with HTG Peer Groups

Q: How can I better connect with people (and in particular, my staff)?  

Coach: What do Maxwell Smart’s shoe phone and the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding have in common? Both teach valuable lessons on effectively connecting with others. 

Before I get to that, I really appreciate the honesty of this question. Simply by asking it, you are not far from where you want to be — because you have a sincere desire to connect.

You may remember the scene in the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding where the proud Greek father wanted to tie every word back to ancient Greek culture, including the Japanese word “kimono.” Today, we want to look at three short Greek words: ethos, pathos, and logos. Stay with me here. These words lay out a simple, yet profound strategy for relating well to others.  I promise we’ll get to Maxwell Smart shortly.     

Ethos is where we get our word ethics. Effective connecting or communication begins with your ethics, your character, your integrity.  This is an ethical question — do you have a genuine desire to connect?  Or do you harbor some ulterior motive, such as a secret desire to manipulate your employees? Your friends? Your family? What is going on in your ethical heart? Your ethical heart communicates that you can be trusted.  It is the foundation of being authentic. You can’t fake ethics, trust and authenticity. You won’t connect well without being genuine. 

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