Ask Coach: What Sharing A Bathroom With 4 Women Taught Me About Family Strategic Planning

By Rich Anderson, executive coach with HTG Peer Groups

Editor’s Note: Few would argue that it’s easier to be productive at work when life at home is functioning smoothly. HTG Peer Groups founder and CEO Arlin Sorensen often talks about how succeeding at business while failing at home is still failing. He encourages HTG members to be intentional about both their work lives and personal lives. 

Q: How do I do strategic planning with my family?

Coach: Have you ever shared one bathroom with four women? I have. It makes for an interesting study in human relations and tests communication and mutual respect like no other situation I know.

That shared bathroom and incidents around it led to what became my first formal facilitated event! My wife and three daughters, aged 6 to 13 at the time, sat before me and my newly purchased tripod and flip chart. Inspired by Gary Smalley’s Hidden Keys to Loving Relationships video series, I stood there. Four beautiful smiling faces looked up at the man who was determined to lead them to the promised land of bathroom peace and harmony. What came out of that extended, multi-evening discussion became our family constitution.  

Why Strategically Plan As A Family?  

Working on a strategic family plan or a family constitution will unify you as a family. Laying out your values, rules, and violation consequences will reduce family stress, fussing, and feuding. You will enhance communication that is honoring for all of your loved ones. Your family core values will be intentionally identified, prioritized, and documented. Your kids will feel more secure knowing they have been heard, knowing a resolution is in place and knowing the family rules. 

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